^^

i just felt so much like a horrible person today!! maybe i really am. i woke up early in the morning at 7 am preparing to go to work. but then i realise that i have tuition at 10 30 ltr!! so i just went back to slp guiltily! wanting to contact them ltr. my ic sms ed me around 9 asking me where am i. so i told her the truth, i dont even have thought of lying to her or what. hello? this is a sat morning! its my fault, thats why im feeling guilty! i shouldnt have told her that i can work on sat morning T.T but then in the end, the student said this week cnot. start next week. again, i totally understand thats my fault for not making it clear at first T.T im not being sarcastic. suddenyl all the depressed thoughts just came up. is this what im doing really what im enjoying? why am i doing this. for money? yes thats true. but i always wanted to do something that i enjoy as well/ this apply to poly as well. is that really what i want for the rest of my life?? really?? you sure? i dont have the courage like roliah to start all over again. or are all this just reality T.T